It’s Hanukkah season!!!!! You know the holiday that everyone forgets about. Well here are 8 fun/real facts about The Jewish Christmas.
1: Hanukkah celebrates the victory of the Maccabees or Israelites over the Greek-Syrian ruler, Antiochus about 2200 years ago. It is not about other great victories in Jewish history like:
The New York Yankees winning the World Series over The Mets
Bill Goldberg beating Hulk Hogan
Seinfeld winning a Emmy
Mel Gibson dying of cancer
Being undefeated at the game Monopoly
2: Each night of Hanukkah, an additional candle is placed in the Menorah from right to left, and then lit from left to right. On the last night, all the candles are lit. Also if you lit more then one candle on one night you will be sent to Jewish hell when you die. Jewish hell is also known as Germany.
3: During Hanukkah, families eat latkes(potato pancakes) and sufganiot (jelly donuts), or other foods which are fried in oil, to celebrate and commemorate the miracle of the Festival of Lights. On the other days of the year they eat potatoes covered in jelly.
The Festival of Lights is also a name of a Jewish rave they have each year.
4: In Yemen, children went from house to house, tins in hand, to collect wicks for the Hanukkah Menorah.Unlike in the Adrian Peterson household where children go from house to house to collect switches.
5: In Germany, the eighth and last night of Hanukkah used to be very special. All the leftover wicks and oil were lit in giant bonfires. People sang songs and danced around the fire, often until the small hours of the night.
The key part in that first part is “used to be”. I can’t figure out why they stopped doing this. It may have something with the combo of Germany,Jewish people and giant bonfires.
6: Traditionally, Hanukkah is a time when children are encouraged and rewarded for their Torah studies. Consequently, it became fashionable to give the children Hanukkah money and presents during the holiday. What’s Hanukkah money? You might be asking. It’s money they get so they can go out and buy Christmas presents lie normal people.
7: Except in times of religious persecution, the menorah was placed outside the front door or, as is the custom today, displayed in the window of every Jewish home. They did this so people would know which homes not to break into cause they had lame Hanukkah gifts.
8: Hanukkah is celebrated in the home beginning on the 25th day of the Jewish month of Kislev. Kislev is of course better known Novdecember. A Jewish year has 24 months. Like Junly,Sepocttember, Macpril and Janbruary.
Welcome back! Part 2 of 4 of the worst WWE gimmicks ever. These 15 might be my “favorite” of all 4 parts. A lot of “what in the hell were they thinking?!” and “How high was Vince?” So lets get to these losers. (Once again I would like to remind people that this list is in alphabetical order. So if you don’t see someone like Nailz or Xanta Claus don’t worry.)
Speaking of Xanta Claus……..
Back in the late 90’s WWE had a lot of gangs. Representing the whites was D.O.A. Lead by Mr.Heart Punch himself Crush. These dudes would ride their bikes down to the ring which was a pretty great idea cause the noise would wake the crowd up. Not a big impact on pro-wrestling but I’m pretty sure if it wasn’t for D.O.A there wouldn’t be a S.O.A.
Clowns are creepy. They’re also make for awful wrestlers. Truth be told Doink was my favorite guy to be in WWF Raw back on Genesis. However I look at Doink like those Ernest movies. Yea they were pretty funny when you were 7 but didn’t really stand the test of time. Doink and the D.O.A’s Crush did have one of my favorite Wrestlemaina moments ever. Watch video below.
The Duke of trash made his debut back in the early 90’s. The fact that his gimmick was about trash was pretty ironic. (Cause he was trash) Duke had a feud with Triple H. One of those 2 went on to become one of the greatest wrestlers ever and the other one went on to become a pretty ok asst.manager at Radio Shack.
A special-needs wrestler………….oh do I need to go on? I feel like whoever thought of this gimmick had special needs. Sadly Eugene won the tag titles with William Regal. That was the high point in his very low career. He caught the small bus out of the WWE in 2007 and has never seen again.
It’s crazy who these last 3 jobbers had feuds with. Triple H had feuds with Duke and Eugene and Executioner made his debut by attacking The Undertaker at a In Your House. That was about it for him. After Taker beat him at In Your House: It’s Time The Executioner’s career was sentence to death.
I just put this midget wrestler on here cause he looks like a pedophile. Think about that for second this pedophile looked like a child. Talk about your ice-breakers!
Double F is one of the main reasons why a lot of wrestling fans hate WWE. Better known for being the great 2 Cold Scorpio in WCW and ECW, he was made into a very bad joke in WWE. I always will look at Flash Funk as one of many Vince’s middle fingers he gave wrestling fans………HOWEVER GREAT THEME MUSIC!
Speaking of looking like a pedophile…..Friar Ferguson has in and out of WWE only after a few weeks. Some say he went back to preaching the good word and others say they don’t give a shit. Friar is one Ferguson I wouldn’t mind watching burn to the ground.
This dude was 8 feet tall!………8 feet! Not 7! 8!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Eight!!!!!!!!!!!!
*Talking about his height cause that’s all anyone remembers about him. Oh yea he also feuded The Undertaker. Man, Taker had some pretty lame feuds.
Who’s next? Who cares?! We wanted to know who’s first! Gillberg was a parody of Goldberg and a lot like how Hot Shots was better than Top Gun, Gillberg was better than Goldberg. He held the Light Heavyweight Title for 15 months!!!!!!! Which speaks more to how much of a joke that “title” was.
I know! We all loved him but come on. It was a bit much. The father of the Ho Train is what the Attitude Era was all about…..over the top racism.
After being kicked off of every hockey team he played for Goon came to WWE to bore people to death. Just like most NHL players nobody wanted to see Goon. His god damn finishing move was a him checking people into the ring post. He would win all of his matches by count-out! (Not saying he won many matches.) Goon went on strike and hasn’t been seen since.
Headbangers were made so that fans of Marilyn Manson and Korn would have someone to root for. But just like Marilyn Manson and Korn they quickly got old and easily forgotten. The Headbangers did what they said they would do. They made people bang their hands against a wall questioning their life.
We go from Korn to BSB! Antonio and Romeo made up this classic team. Making their debut in 2005 The Throbs quickly became a fan favorite………but that ended by the time they made it to the ring. The only good thing about these 2 is that they went bye bye bye only after a few months.
Stand back,there’s a Hurricane coming though! WWE’s favorite superhero (Sorry Steve Blackman) made his debut in 2001. His superpower? Oh it was being awful. There is no human that could have been as awful as he was. I mean his favorite superhero was The Green Lantern! Nobody likes that dude. Fun fact: Ryan Reynolds favorite wrestler was The Hurricane! Just joking nobody like The Hurricane. I’m pretty sure Hurricane Katrina had more fans.
Well there you have it! Part 2 of 4. Feel free to comment below for people you think should have been on one of the first 2 parts or people you hope to see in parts 3 or 4.
Christmas is the Kesha of holidays. It seems to start earlier each year. This year I think I saw a tree up on July 5th. It’s a huge deal here in America. The music however………..It’s not that great. The ones that are good get played to death. So I made a list of Christmas songs that you don’t hear every year or never want to.
R2-D2 We Wish You A Merry Christmas:
Now I’m going to try to not to tear each song apart but a Christmas Star Wars song? It doesn’t even make sense. Star Wars takes place a long long time ago. That means before Christ! I mean Kesha wasn’t born until the 80’s!!! Also fun fact about this “song”. It’s Bon Jovi singing it!
Barking dogs singing We Wish You A Merry Christmas:
After hearing this, I’m a huge Michael Vick fan.
I Think You Might Like It:
Remember that one Christmas when you got nothing you wanted? You thought that was the worst X-Mas ever? Well John Travolta is going to try his hardest to make you forget about that day with his gift of ear cancer.
How much money does he need?! I mean I hope he got paid and didn’t pay to do this shit. After watching this trash I can see why both of these dicks weren’t asked to be in Grease 2
Ring The Bell:
For those who don’t know. I LOVE WRESTLING! But even I have to say this is fucking awful. I do agree with the title. RING THE DAMN BELL! STOP THIS SONG!
A Very Sara Xmas:
There should be more Christmas songs like this……….
I Want A Hippopotamus For Christmas:
This lil brat needs to get a job. Lets just look past her being a bitch and focus on the video. What’s with her dance moves in the middle? I feel like she may want to get that brain tumor taken care of for Christmas and save the hippo for Flag Day.
I’m Gettin’ Nuttin’ For Christmas:
Back to back rotten kids. At least this one is gettin nuttin. The list of things this kid has done all year make me believe that this must be a young serial killer. The twist by the way is that the family is Jewish.
NKOTB! When I looked this up and saw that it was 5 minutes long I was pretty pissed but after listening to it I was ready to track down all 5 members and murder them. WTF was Mr.Wahlberg and the gang thinking?! They should have named this song Shity,Shity X-Mas.
Someday At Christmas:
Someday At Christmas is like the rich man’s War Is Over by John Lennon. That being said doesn’t Stevie sound like a chick in this song? Like my god. It kind of makes me feel even worse for him. Not only is he blind but he sounds like a bitch? Why does god hate him so much?
All I want For Christmas:
I know that this is a pretty famous Christmas song but man alive!…..The video! I don’t follow Justin Bieber but I thought dancing was one of his things. What in the hell is he doing? He looks like he has special needs. The whole thing seems like a very cheap J.C Penny ad. Which would make it a very rich K-Mart ad.
Come On Christmas:
Do you need a Christmas song to kill yourself to? Well I got one for you! Come On Christmas by Dwight Yoakam is just the song you need while you’re hanging yourself cause the only Merry Christmas texts you got were from a wrong number and the one you sent from your second phone.
The Christmas Songs:
You know what Christmas needs more of? The Hoff! David is such a genius. Instead of just making a new Christmas song he just took old ones and ruined them! Thanks Mr.Rider! I do dig his Han Solo look he is rocking in the video.
The Christmas Shoes:
Just voted the worst X-Mas song ever. Christmas Shoes is about some loser buying his mother some Vans for Christmas. The thing that makes the whole song sad is that she wanted Converse.
It Must Be Santa:
0: The number of fucks Bob Dylan gave while doing this trash.
Please Daddy Don’t Get Drunk This Christmas:
Best title ever! John Denver begging his dad not to get drunk is pretty catchy. Fun fact: John Denver’s dad was a drunk and he was also the pilot of John Denver’s plane.
Well there you have it! I hope you have a very Kesha Christmas and a Stone Cold New Year’s!!!!!!!
I don’t know if you heard but the zombie apocalypse has started down in Dallas. Man alive! I hate Tony Romo so much. The Ebola virus is here in America folks and it’s a big deal. Just ask Fox News. They will tell you! So to get your mind off of you dying a painful death pretty soon, I came up with a list a songs that are more catchy than Ebola……and some that are a lot more painful. That way before you turn into a walker (Walking Dead joke!) you can have the band Aqua in your head.
YMCA by The Village People
We start off with a classic. The song is so good and fun to sing that we don’t even really listen to any other parts besides them spelling YMCA. The whole middle part is about them inviting dudes over to the YMCA locker room for what can only be described as a very long and a very naked steam shower. The only things might be more catchy than this song might be only found at the YMCA.
We Are The Champions by Queen
Not sure what they are the champions of but this song is so fun to sing at bars when you win at pool. Not so much fun for the other person, but fuck them.This song will never be heard at a Cubs game.
Simply The Best by Tina Turner
Kind of like Queen not sure what Tina think she was “better than all the rest” at…..I mean it can’t be music. Maybe acting? She did kill it in Thunder Dome!
Butterfly by Aqua
I got a Aqua song on here and it isn’t Barbie Girl?! Yes and if you never heard this song before you will see why and wonder how in the hell were Aqua one hit wonders. The song itself sounds like a poor man’s Enter The Ninja by Ant Woord. Which is kind of bullshit cause Butterfly came out first…….but whatever.
I Love You by Barney & This Old Man by Some D-Bag.
So the best thing about writing for Face The Music is that I get to find some real random songs like I Love You. I haven’t heard this song since I was a kid………DUDE!!!!! BARNEY IS A RIP-OFF! It’s just This Odd Man with different lyrics! Like WTF?! I thought Barney was all about imagination?
Runaway Train by Soul Asylum
The soundtrack to the 90’s would have this hit on it.
Fun Fact: Soul Asylum made song named Runaway Bus that was on Speed’s soundtrack.
Superstar by Toybox
Who? It’s Toybox! You know them! They had that song. You know! This one! It’s about them being superstars and being rich! Well if you don’t know them,swing by the Target near Atlanta cause that is where they work now.
Diddley-Dee by The Cartoons
Oh it can get worse………Diddley-Dee is like Cotton Eye Joe if Joe had a huge meth problem.
Witch Doctor by The Cartoons
They’re back!!!!!! Before I made this list I had no clue who these dudes were but now I think of them as one of the greatest things that ever happened to music and to mankind. Thank you Cartoons for sharing your gift with all of us.
Poundcake by Jay-T
Ok I’m sorry but this song is way better than the food it’s named after. I just like how angry he is. JUST GIVE HIM SOME GOD DAMN POUNDCAKE! Nobody else likes it.
Mickey by Toni Basil
Oh Mickey you’re so fine, you’re so fine you blow my mind! Hey Mickey!
“OTHER LYRICS NOBODY KNOWS”
Oh Mickey you’re so fine, you’re so fine you blow my mind! Hey Mickey!
Oh Mickey you’re so fine, you’re so fine you blow my mind! Hey Mickey!
Heyayayay by He-Man
If you have 10 hours to waste watch this……also get a fucking job.
You Don’t Know Me by Ray Charles
The first slow jam of the list. Mr.Charles is crying about some bitch (who was probably ugly as hell by the way. I mean how could he know?” during this song but man it’s great.
Fun Fact: You might know Ray Charles from his role in the movie Booty Call.
Christmas Don’t Be Late by The Chipmunks
Someone should really buy the Chipmunks a calendar. Christmas is on the same date every year you dumb rats. Well I guess if they were that smart they would ask for something better than a hoolahoop……I mean hello! PS4!
Hot In Here by Nelly
Every list I make Nelly always finds a way to get on them. Hot In Here is of course from his best album ever Now That’s What I Call Music VOL. 11
Dominick The Donkey by God
If the list was most underrated songs ever this would be number 1. The plot doesn’t really make any sense but you cares you will be singing it until Christmas 2034.
Unforgettable by Nat King Cole and Natalie “Princess” Cole
Fun Fact: King Cole and Sam Cooke were like besties
The Duck Song by A Duck (#duh)
A f’n classic!!!!!! The number of views on this video will make you question life
*also look out for The Duck Song 2 on the side!
Friday by Rebecca Black
I’m no doctor but this song has to a lot like brain cancer. You can’t just get it out of your head and you know it’s killing you. I’m 100% sure a 6 year old wrote this song but man did they do a great job! The song makes everyday feel like Friday! It also makes you look like a asshole when you’re singing it.
Rebecca Black loves this song just cause Fridays are the only day she has off from working the corner for coke money.