Tag Archives: songs


Joshua’s Favorite TV Themes ever


What makes a good show great? Having a awesome theme song! Just look at Lost. That show was pretty……Ok, Lost sucked. Here is Joshua’s list of his favorite theme songs ever and as always if you don’t agree you can go fuck yourself.

WKRP in Cincinnati:
I don’t even remember what this show was even really about but I do remember watching this show when I was home cause I was “sick” and couldn’t go to school.
 I think 1380 should cover the theme. I found the full song for you. If you don’t like it then you’re a liar or deaf.

The Rockford Files:
Hey! It’s the dude from The Notebook! Rockford was my brother’s favorite show so that means that I hated every second of it. However the first 2 minutes I did enjoy jamming out to this tune. I like how the music matches up great of video of Rockford getting his ass kicked.

Sesame Street:
Sunny days are here. The song is a bit outdated now cause you don’t need to sing a song to find out where a street is, you can just use your phone. I do find it funny how nobody answers this chick. Help her! She needs to buy some drugs from Oscar.

Charles in Charge:
A male nanny?! Sure ok……Charles in Charge was on tv for a long time for some reason. My only guess is a lot of that is due to the ratings the show got when it started every week. The song is great.

The Sopranos:
If you ever needed a song to get you pump to smash someone’s head in with a pipe this was it. The Sopranos was a iconic show. It also give me the cool idea that anything that has the letter “r” in it I can spell it with a gun. A lot of people knock the last episode for just cutting to black however I think it was pretty…

The Dukes of Hazzard:
Lets get in our cars and jump over things! These good old boys knew how to have some fun. The show was the best thing for white trash/rednecks ever made. I mean man alive their car was named The General Lee! LIKE WTF?! Why in the hell would you get a car that doors can’t open?

What’s Happening!!:
This is a very loud song! You have been warned

The X-Files:
Still gives me chills. The show kind of went downhill when T-1000 took over but still one of the greatest shows in the history of t.v
*in the history of Fox shows
( I wasn’t allowed to share the X-Files theme. But look it up it’s great! Trust me!)
The Brady Bunch:
So what happened to the father and the mother of the Brady kids? You never heard from them or anything about them? Seems odd. I think they were murdered…..anyways here is a great tune!

The Greatest American Hero:
A lot of you probably never heard of The Greatest American Hero. Unless you’re thinking of Stone Cold Steve Austin. The show was trash. I dare you to watch a full episode. The theme to it however was f’n great! George even used it for his answering machine. Watch below.

Welcome Back Kotter:
Johnny T was in this show! This song is so great that one of the best rappers ever Mase cover it! (It was awful) Here is both of them for your listening enjoyment.

The A-Team:
If you can find them, please tell them that their theme song is great. If you can’t find them just call The B-Team. They’re easy to find and they got members like Mr.s and Head.

Night Court:
Court is never fun. But have it at night and then it’s pretty ok.

Laverne & Shirley:
These dikes were the best thing from Milwaukee ever. Their theme song is pretty catchy as well. Still not sure what they were saying in the start of it but it probably means something about strap-ons.

Mr. Ed:
Did you know that Mr.Ed was on tv for 5 years? How in the hell did they keep this going for 5 years? Just awful. Here is one for fact they had a spin-off called Mr.Glue. It was about talking glue. It only was around for 3 years.

Sanford & Son:
Junkyard funk at it’s best!

Knight Rider:
The last one is the best one! Knight Rider was not only at kick ass show about a cool dude with a leather jacket who drives a talking car (Who sounded a lot like the principal from Boy Meets World) but it also had the coolest theme ever! I can listen to this for 17 hours at a time. Sit back and enjoy this classic.

Well there you have it. Joshua’s favorite tv themes. If you think I forgot one or something please comment below. If you don’t like my list…..well make your own list so I can whine like a bitch about that one. THANKS!

Joshua’s Favorite Disney Songs

From The Lion King to Toy Story, Disney has a lot of great songs that we all know and love. Here is a list of my favorites. If you disagree……well you can go Hakuna Matata yourself.

You’ve Got A Friend In Me:
The thing that makes song so fun is Randy Newman’s voice. It makes you feel that you can also sing. Also I like this song cause it makes people think that Tom Hanks and Tim Allen are friends. There is no chance in hell that Mr.Gump is friends with Joe Somebody.
Bear Necessities:
Hey it’s the bear from Tail Spins! Bear Necessities is just one great song! I can really relate to it as well. Like I eat ants all the time. Looking back on this movie kind of makes me question the “friendship” between Blaoo and his boy slave but whatever a bear needs to do what a bears needs to do, I guess.
Hakuna Matata:
The best thing Billy Crystal has ever done! I can’t start to tell you how much this song helped me out in my life. Like that one time I hit someone with my car and took off. When the police told me that the woman died and asked me why I ran, I said “HAKUNA MATATA!”. We had a good laugh and I served 15 years in jail.
Heigh Ho:
The hardest working men in Disney. These 7 little people made a great song about their favorite way to say hello to Snow White.
Under The Sea:
“Listen to me. The human world, it’s a mess.” Sebastian is a great promoter. He made me want to live under the sea. Detroit should hire him, so that people would want to move there. They new slogan could be “Detroit is the bubbles!” and by bubbles I mean shit.
Let It Go:
I got to be honest if you. I have never saw Frozen or want to see it. However I got to say this song is f’n great! I don’t even know or care what the other lyrics are. I just wait until I can yell LET IT GOOOOOOOOO!. I’m 30 by the way.
A Whole New World:
Aladdin taking his bitch for a ride.  I wondered what Aladdin is up to now. He’s probably enjoying his life leading The ISIS
*Fun fact: Aladdin is voiced by D.J’s boyfriend from Full House.
Circle Of Life:
One more for The King! Circle Of Life is a great song but the title of the song doesn’t really match this video. I don’t think a monkey and a lion would ever be friends. I’m calling bullshit! It’s one of my favorite Elton John songs…….I don’t who in the hell this whore singing is.
When You Wish Upon A Star:
I’m a real boy! I never got into Pinocchio. The whole plot seems a bit off to me. We got some old dude making little boy sex dolls and then one of his wet dreams comes to life when one turns into a real boy? That’s sick! I guess it really doesn’t matter who you are when you wish upon a star. #Sandusky
Ugly Bug Ball:
Here’s a random one for you. Not even sure what’s this from but it’s great. I think Cee Lo Green should check out this ball. The dude looks like a ugly beetle.
I said "forget you"! You damn bug.
I said “forget you”! You damn bug.

Never Smile At a Crocodile:
Christopher Walken hates crocodiles!

A Goofy Movie’s soundtrack:
A Goofy Movie is probably one of the most underrated Disney movies ever. Not sure why. I mean it won like 87 Oscars! (Not sure about that number) here is 3 great songs. Eye to Eye, Stand Out and On The Open Road. Enjoy!

Bibbidi Bobbidi Boo:
You know listening to these songs back to back like this, make me realize that most of these songs just make up words. Walt Disney was just a poor man’s Dr. Seuss
The World Greatest Criminal Mind:
Love this song! The Great Mouse Detective only had 2 songs like this on it’s soundtrack. The other songs were just background music. But hey when you have such a classic like this who gives a shit about the other shit you have on your shity soundtrack.
*Fun Fact: The dude singing is Edward Scissorhands father.

Oogie Boogie Song:
I can’t even start to tell you how hard it was not to fill this list with Nightmare Before Christmas songs. So I just picked this one. I like Oogie Boogie…..still not sure what he is. Maybe a potato bag or something? Also is he some type of casino owner? But he sure can sing! The thing I like most about Nightmare is that it’s one of the few Tim Burton movies that doesn’t show his gay love he has for Johnny Depp
Well there you have it! Please keep in mind that this is called “Joshua’s Favorite Disney Songs” and not ” Some Random Asshole’s Favorite Disney Songs” so please don’t flip out if you don’t see one of your favorites on here but please comment below to tell me your list.
a santa

Merry Kesha-Mas!

Christmas is the Kesha of holidays. It seems to start earlier each year. This year I think I saw a tree up on July 5th. It’s a huge deal here in America. The music however………..It’s not that great. The ones that are good get played to death. So I made a list of Christmas songs that you don’t hear every year or never want to.

R2-D2 We Wish You A Merry Christmas:
Now I’m going to try to not to tear each song apart but a Christmas Star Wars song? It doesn’t even make sense. Star Wars takes place a long long time ago. That means before Christ! I mean Kesha wasn’t born until the 80’s!!! Also fun fact about this “song”. It’s Bon Jovi singing it!
Barking dogs singing We Wish You A Merry Christmas:
After hearing this, I’m a huge Michael Vick fan.
I Think You Might Like It:
Remember that one Christmas when you got nothing you wanted? You thought that was the worst X-Mas ever? Well John Travolta is going to try his hardest to make you forget about that day with his gift of ear cancer.
How much money does he need?! I mean I hope he got paid and didn’t pay to do this shit. After watching this trash I can see why both of these dicks weren’t asked to be in Grease 2
Ring The Bell:
For those who don’t know. I LOVE WRESTLING! But even I have to say this is fucking awful. I do agree with the title. RING THE DAMN BELL! STOP THIS SONG!
A Very Sara Xmas:
There should be more Christmas songs like this……….
I Want A Hippopotamus For Christmas:
This lil brat needs to get a job. Lets just look past her being a bitch and focus on the video. What’s with her dance moves in the middle? I feel like she may want to get that brain tumor taken care of for Christmas and save the hippo for Flag Day.
I’m Gettin’ Nuttin’ For Christmas:
Back to back rotten kids. At least this one is gettin nuttin. The list of things this kid has done all year make me believe that this must be a young serial killer. The twist by the way is that the family is Jewish.
Funky,Funky X-Mas:
NKOTB! When I looked this up and saw that it was 5 minutes long I was pretty pissed but after listening to it I was ready to track down all 5 members and murder them. WTF was Mr.Wahlberg and the gang thinking?! They should have named this song Shity,Shity X-Mas.
Someday At Christmas:
Someday At Christmas is like the rich man’s War Is Over by John Lennon. That being said doesn’t Stevie sound like a chick in this song? Like my god. It kind of makes me feel even worse for him. Not only is he blind but he sounds like a bitch? Why does god hate him so much?
All I want For Christmas:
I know that this is a pretty famous Christmas song but man alive!…..The video! I don’t follow Justin Bieber but I thought dancing was one of his things. What in the hell is he doing? He looks like he has special needs. The whole thing seems like a very cheap J.C Penny ad. Which would make it a very rich K-Mart ad.
Come On Christmas:
Do you need a Christmas song to kill yourself to? Well I got one for you! Come On Christmas by Dwight Yoakam is just the song you need while you’re hanging yourself cause the only Merry Christmas texts you got were from a wrong number and the one you sent from your second phone.
The Christmas Songs:
You know what Christmas needs more of? The Hoff! David is such a genius. Instead of just making a new Christmas song he just took old ones and ruined them! Thanks Mr.Rider! I do dig his Han Solo look he is rocking in the video.
The Christmas Shoes:
Just voted the worst X-Mas song ever. Christmas Shoes is about some loser buying his mother some Vans for Christmas. The thing that makes the whole song sad is that she wanted Converse.
It Must Be Santa:
0: The number of fucks Bob Dylan gave while doing this trash.
Please Daddy Don’t Get Drunk This Christmas:
Best title ever! John Denver begging his dad not to get drunk is pretty catchy. Fun fact: John Denver’s dad was a drunk and he was also the pilot of John Denver’s plane.
Well there you have it! I hope you have a very Kesha Christmas and a Stone Cold New Year’s!!!!!!!
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17 Songs Nobody Knows The Words To

It’s The End Of The World by R.E.M
Right,Right? Those are the first 2 words I can here clearly in this song. I think the beauty of I.T.E.O.T.M is that it’s so fast that people probably think that R.E.M is saying something really deep but really the song is most likely just about Andy Kaufman again. They really loved that dude. Also the video doesn’t give you any clues to what they’re saying. If I watched the video on mute (Which is a great way to watch most of R.E.M’s videos) I would guess that this song is about some homeless kid living in some type of meth house……Hey maybe they were on meth when they wrote this song.
Yellow Ledbetter by Pearl Jam
A classic P.Jam song. It sounds like he is saying yellow bed wetter. That would have been a much better way to go. I don’t what a ledbetter is…..or care to look it up. Anyone who says they have any clue what is being said during this song is a god damn liar. I bet the members of Pearl Jam have no clue what the “lyrics” are of this song. I rather get killed by Jeremy than to listen to this song again.
Bennie and The Jets by Elton John
I love me some Elton John. He was like my Kesha before Kesha was my Kesha. But this song I always thought that maybe he did way too many shots of something before doing it. It starts off with him hitting some random key by mistake. I just like that fact that after he was done with the recording he was like “Yep that is the one we’re going to use…..NO! I don’t want to do it again! That was perfect!”
This song was also use to get me mad by my brother growing up. Being a life long New York Jets fan. My brother use to change the lyrics to “Better than The Jets” and that use to get me so f’n mad. Thanks Elton. You could have made it Bennie and The Pats or something.
Have You Ever Seen The Rain by C.C Revival (John Fogerty)
I added a video with the lyrics for this one. Just try to read along. It doesn’t even add up at some parts. Like it says sunny on the video but when he says sunny it sounds nothing like the word. To answer your question John, yes I have seen rain before
We Didn’t Start The Fire by Billy Joel
If there was ever a song to prove that lyrics don’t matter in a song it’s this one. He is for real just listing things that happened in each decade but my god it’s catchy! The video makes me ask a lot of questions like is Billy a ghost or or something? Or like a time traveler? Also what’s the deal with those crazy pictures in the back like the dude getting shot in the head or the slave tie to a tree? I feel odd jamming out and seeing someone getting lynched. One of the only parts I know is “JFK blown away!” I love shouting that part. Also who did start the fire? Must have been the some dude that let the dogs out.
Racks by Y.C
Might be the worse out of all of these songs. Racks I think is about money or he might be talking about tits or maybe real racks. I really don’t know cause I can’t understand anything he is saying. You would think with all of that money he could have gotten some subtitles for his video. I CAN’T WAIT FOR THE ENGLISH VERSION!
Informer by Snow
I don’t think I need to waste time talking about how you can’t understand anything he is saying in this song. At one point I think he says “lick your boom boom”. I just want to point out some fun things from the video. Like the name of his album. 12 Inches Of Snow? Man, someone thought highly of themselves. The video also points out how far ahead Snow was for his time. Just check out that shirt he is rocking with the Sega Dreamcast logo on it. That didn’t even come out until like 7 years later! But my favorite is when he is locked up in the jail at the end of the video he doesn’t look like a badass rapper he looks like a pedophile
Pour Some Sugar On Me by Def Leppard
Within first second I get lost. Is he saying “Love is like a bomb?” and it’s all down hill after that. This is one of the songs that comes on at the bar and everyone just waits for the chorus. I don’t think anyone cares what the song is about, they just feel bad for the handicap dude playing drums in the band. I notice that they’re wearing Def Leppard t-shirts while they’re on stage in the video. Something about that just seems lame.
Louie,Louie by The Kingsmen
Pretty much every marching band in every high school played this song. I guess it should speak more how bad The Kingsmen were if any random group of teenagers can play and in many cases make your song better. All of The Kingsmen couldn’t piece a great song together again! That’s a Humpty Dumpty joke! Should I even ask who Louie was? Yea it doesn’t matter
Who Let The Dogs Out by The Baha Men
I feel like every list I make on here I have this song on there……..
Stacy’s Mom by Fountains Of Wayne
This song owned the radio back in 2003. After watching the video Stacy’s mom is a whore. Undressing in front of the window like that. No wonder Rod Stewart turned gay. (She was his wife btw) I like how he couldn’t want to jerk off until he got home. Who would do that in someone’s else bathroom? Just rude.
Karma Chameleon by Culture Club
Right off the bat. Are we really suppose to believe that Boy George could walk around Mississippi in 1870 looking like that? He couldn’t even walk around like that in Mississippi today without being shot at. The video looks like it is based off of the hit movie Maverick. I’m sure Boy George and Mel Gibson would have been great friends
Thong Song by Sisqo
Remember Sisqo?! We all thought he was the second coming of 2-Pac after this was released…..no? Just me? Well after watching this video I will have to question his choice in clothes. All silver dude? Just saying that maybe that thong that his daughter found at the start of the video was his.
Soak Up The Sun by Sheryl Crow
A great feel good song. Every time I hear it it makes me think of summer and just hanging out drinking. Drinking is what Miss. Lance Armstrong must have been doing while writing this song. It puts you such in a great mood that you really don’t care that none of the other lyrics make any god damn sense.
Hollaback Girl by Gwen Stefani
Gwen was once in a band called No Doubt. They made some great songs but Gwen thought it would be a great idea to make the opposite type of songs. That’s how Hollaback Girl was born. It does help teach people how to spell banana. Outside of that it’s almost heard to listen to without wanting to hang yourself. My favorite part of the video is when she says how she isn’t a hollaback girl while driving around in a car that says “hollaback girl” on the hood. Huh?
Can’t Touch This by M.C Hammer
Why is this song soooooo long? Like what the hell? The video starts out with people handing Mr.Hammer a lot of awards. Awards I’m sure he sold so he can pay his Rent-A-Center bills.
Whoomp! by Tag Team
Tag Team back again!……Were they here before? Tag Team or as I call them the rich man’s N.W.A made this classic and never looked back since. Mostly cause nobody ask them to come back. The video looks like it was made at some type of rave/basketball game/circus. I can only imagine what they said when they saw the finished project. Tag Team broke up in 1998 after one member turned on the other during a match with The Nasty Boyz.
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